Hogan's Heroes a Visit from General Burkhalter
by fanfaction lover
Summary: This is the story of the men of Hogan's Heroes and how the General is determined to marry off his sister. But Colonel Hogan had other things in mind, such as the bombing of a ball bearing plant.
1. Chapter 1

The cold and the darkness of the prisoner of war barracks at Stalag 13 was unbearable. Food was scarce and the soup and coffee was always cold. That is unless you were in the barracks with Colonel Hogan. The men of the barracks enjoyed chocolate and food provided by them by the submarine that was in constant contact with them.

Every time the men of Hogan's barracks got something special they would bring the treats to the other men that were stuck in the stalag. Many of the men wondered where the men from Hogan's barracks got their treats but they assumed it was from the Red Cross because of Colonel Hogan.

The wind was blowing on that cold winter day as the men went out to roll call. As they stood there while Schultz did the counting f the men they saw a staff car pull up. Out of the car came General Burkhalter. , Albert Burkhalter always meant trouble and as the men went into the barracks they lifted the lid off of the coffee pot so that they could listen in on the conversation that was going on in Colonel Klink's office.

Long ago the men of the barracks had set up a wire tap through the coffee pot. The sound quality was poor, especially if someone used the coffee pot to make a cup of coffee, but if they listened carefully they could hear everything that was being said without being seen by any of the Germans that kept a watchful eye on them. The coffee pot was just one of the many things that Colonel Hogan and his men had managed to place in and around the Colonel's office to help with spying on him and any officer that arrived at the camp. Behind the bookcase that was located just to the right of the Colonel's desk was the wire going up to the roof that led to the antenna that provided radio service. That two way radio was their contact with the submarine that came by every seven to ten days. That submarine provided the men with tools that they needed and transported prisoners back to England. It was their lifeline with the outside world.

At the door they kept a constant watch for anyone who might come to the barracks. Usually during the day the only one that was apt to show up was Sargent Schultz. Schultz was not interested for the most part in what they were doing, but he was still a German soldier and had to be dealt with very carefully.

As the men gathered around the coffee pot, they heard Colonel Klink and the general greet each other. The general was not a fool and had to be dealt with carefully. Unlike Klink he was dedicated to the war effort and was a career man who was quick to catch on to things. He could not stand Klink. He thought that the best thing the Germans could do was to keep him here at a prisoner of war camp. Several times he had thought about sending him and some of his men to the Russian front, but he thought that they already had enough trouble there.

The General was there to do his inspection of the camp and make sure that everything was in order. Colonel Klink was so non productive that figuring out his books and the happenings at the camp were near to impossible. The conversation centered mostly on the inspection of the barracks and the going over of the books and the men who were held prisoner and the guards who guarded them.

This was going to play havoc with the men of Hogan's barracks. There was a war going on and they had jobs to do. There was a ball bearing plant just outside of the camp that they were planning on burning within the next few days and they had three escaped prisoners downstairs in the tunnel waiting to leave for England via the submarine. The submarine would also be in range of the radio that they had within three days. Because the General was there they also would have to close up the entrance to the tunnel. This entrance was located on one of the bunks and it would have to be temporarily closed. They did not want an inspection where the Germans found that entrance. It was the main entrance to the tunnel and all of the other tunnels that were located in the camp.

But on the other hand the General would keep Klink busy and out of their way. It was with pleasure that they heard the General talking about his sister Gertrude. His sister was brash and bossy and Colonel Klink had no interest in her at all. But the General was always trying to get his sister married off and as a single officer Klink was a likely candidate. Hogan would put some fuel on the fire and perhaps get rid of Klink for a few nights.

Colonel Hogan headed over to Colonel Klink's office and knocked on his door. When Klink called for him to come in he walked in. Acting as though he had no idea that the General was there he acted as though he was surprised to see him. "Good morning sir." Colonel Hogan said to the General as he saluted him. The General did return the salute, but like Hogan his heart was not in it.

Colonel Hogan smiled at the two men as he reached into Klink's stash of cigars and lit one. "Why this is a surprise. Colonel Klink and I were just talking about you and your lovely sister . He was mentioning how he was wondering how she was doing." he said with a smile.

Colonel Klink could have shot the man right there. Just the other day he had mentioned the General's sister. He slammed the cigar box closed after Colonel Hogan had removed three cigars and asked him "How can I help you Colonel Hogan?" He had thought that she would be a great asset to scaring the Russians into remission, not to see her. But his bumbling went unnoticed by the General. "Well my sister just happens to be in town right now. It will be my pleasure to make it so that the two of you can see each other once more." the General offered him.

Colonel Klink cringed inside and stuttered as he said "Well thank you." He turned to glare at Hogan who was smiling to himself.

The job done and the thought that Klink and the General would both find themselves busy with Gertrude Hogan could get back to the job of espionage. Hogan had work to do and he had no time for foolish German matchmaking. He would let the three merry German's handle themselves and just sit back and laugh. Gertrude was the last person that Klink wanted to get involved with, so Klink would be busy for the next few days.

As the men listened to the coffee pot Carter was downstairs working on the bombs that were going to be needed for the bombing of the ball bearing plant. The plant was large but there was a lot of fuel surrounding the building. If the men were able to plant at least one of the bombs in the area of the furnaces, the whole building could go down.

The next job was going to be fir Peter Newkirk. He would be making the badges that the men wore while working at the plant. In order for the men to be given entrance into the plant, they would need identification. He was going to make them identifications that said they were furnace repairmen. With these identifications and the clothing of a German worker it was the hope of Colonel Hogan and his men would gain entrance to the furnaces. They would then plant the bombs and set them to go off shortly once they left.

The group had several German uniforms located in the tunnel, and several different types of identifications. With what they had and a little work, the men were ready for the bombing. They now had to wait for the Colonel and General to set up the Generals sister for a date with Colonel Klink. Life was always a challenge in Stalag 13.


	2. Chapter 2

The prisoners who had found themselves hidden at a prisoner of war camp of all things were getting worried. Sargent Collins had heard the man on the radio talking to the submarine and knew that Colonel Hogan and his men could miss the scheduled pick up. There was some general now at the camp and the men had to be very careful.

As Andrew Carter came down to the tunnel to work on the demolition equipment, he was approached by Sargent Collins and the rest of the men. He had to reassure them once more that everything was going to be all right. The submarine was not due in the area for another few days. Carter knew that it was hard sitting in a dark cold tunnel waiting for a rendezvous with a submarine, but the men were going to have to patient.

The men of the barracks were just about ready for the bombing of the plant and now they were going to have to wait for the General to make his move. They knew that Albert Burkhalter was trying his best to get rid of his sister Gertrude. She was very bossy and he already had to contend with his wife and the other generals. Then of all things he had to put up with men like Colonel Klink.

As the General went into town to tell his sister about the Colonel's interest he laughed to himself. 'What on Earth was he thinking ? The last thing that he needed was to have that idiot Klink as a brother in law. The first thing he was going to do once the man was married to his sister was to send him to the Russian front. That is what he had done with her last husband.

Gertrude was in the parlor of the home that her brother had provided for her, when she heard his car pull up. 'I hope he hasn't found someone for me to date again. It is such a pain in the neck having all these men trying to make points with her brother. The last thing she needed was Colonel Klink coming over.' She knew that he had been at Stalag 13 and she cringed at the thought.

As Albert walked up the stairs to his sister's home he looked around. The house was a nice house with a large floral garden. It was peaceful and far from any war. If you did not know there was a war going on, you would not be able to tell by the house. She had servants and a car at her disposal at all times. Soon, he would be leaving the area once again and he looked forward to that.

They had not been close as siblings when they had been growing up, but now that she was a widow Albert's mother insisted that he take care of her. Gertrude was a very determined woman and fully capable of taking care of herself. She did not need his help, but he felt obligated to his mother and so he did take good care of her. That is why he needed to find her a husband and find her a husband fast.

The trouble was that every able bodied man who was between the ages of fourteen and sixty-five was now out fighting for the father land. There was very slim pickings in the area. Gertrude insisted on having no less than a major for a suitor , which was near impossible for him to find. Except for the occasional officer that came through town for a short time, there were just a very few men. Unfortunately for her and him Klink was about all of the men in the area who were eligible to date her.

As Albert took a seat in the large chair next to the door he smiled at Gertrude. She looked up at him and recognized the look. He wanted her to do something for him, and he did not have the courage to ask her. She looked at him and smiled. It was a mean smile, she found it quite comical that here a big General, a man who spoke to Hitler himself, was nervous to ask something of her. She asked him "What is on your mind today Albert?"

Albert cleared his throat and told her "Colonel Klink would like to come and see you this evening if that is acceptable." He watched for any signs of what his sister was going to say for an answer, but she looked at him stoically. There were no words for a matter of what seemed hours, but in reality was probably just a few moments and then his sister spoke. "Albert, that nervous stuttering man makes me nervous. But, since he is just about all that is available in all of Germany at this time, he will be welcome to come for a visit."

Albert Burkhalter breathed a sigh of relief and told her "The Colonel will be by this evening. I will ask him to call you as soon as I speak to him." With that Albert got up and got back into his private staff car. He was genuinely glad to get back to work.

Colonel Hogan and his men always made an attempt to listen to the conversations on the phone with the coffee pot. Because of their situation, that was not always possible. But, they were waiting for the Colonel to leave the Stalag so that they could do their mission and so an extra effort had been made to listen to all of the calls.

The call finally came through at two o'clock. The General told Klink that his sister Gertrude had agreed to meet with him and that he was to call her at this number. The men noted the number for future reference and the Colonel wrote it down too. After the call there was silence in the office for several minutes. They could picture Klink pacing back and forth in the office, not knowing what to do. Colonel Hogan was getting ready to go to Colonel Klink's office and give the Colonel a good old fashioned push . He wanted to make Klink go into town and meet with Gertrude.

But as Hogan headed out of the door, they heard Klink on the phone. He was calling Gertrude to make a date. He really was a blubbering idiot and they thought that Gertrude must have been very desperate to even agree to meet with Klink. After just five minutes though, the date was set and now it was time for Hogan and their men to get ready for tonight.


	3. Chapter 3

Now it was time for Colonel Hogan and his men to get ready for tonight. The factory that they were going to be bombing was just twenty minutes from the tunnel that they had just outside of the fence. The entrance was hidden and looked as though it was just a tree stump.

They would keep Schultz busy by giving him chocolates and they would be back in an hour. Each of them dressed carefully and it was decided that Carter would do most of the talking. He was fluent in German and could easily pass as a German.

Everyone finished the outfits and outfitted the bomb. It was the perfect night for the bombing. The submarine would be within range at around six that evening also. It was necessary to get the prisoners out to the submarine that evening. Everyone would have to stay low for a few days after the bombing because of the extra patrols that would be sent to the area.

Kinch would take care of the radio contact from the tunnel while two of Hogan's men would make the way to the submarine with the three prisoners. As the evening came and they watched Colonel Klink left the compound the men started to head out.

Kinch had reached the submarine and they would be ready to take the prisoners back to England at seven and he informed them. The three men were thrilled to hear that they would soon be free once more. The men got their meager things together and prepared to step outside once again.

Klink found himself in the car on his way to Gertrude's house. He looked forward to the time with that awful woman like he looked forward to a dull tooth ache. The ride was not a long one and he stopped at a floral shop and picked up some flowers. He wanted to do anything to stall the time that he was going to have to spend with Gertrude.

As he went up the walkway to her house he checked himself once more. He was about as neatly dressed as he could be and he bumbled as he greeted the lady. As Gertrude offered him a seat he sat down and looked forward to nothing, when she nearly took a seat in his lap he thought that he was going to die.

In the meantime the men had managed to get out of the compound unnoticed and as they climbed out of the stump they headed their prospective ways. The three ex prisoners of war made their way to the water, where the submarine was waiting for them. As they took the raft over to the submarine they waved and thanked the men who had saved them from a prison if war camp. Being a prisoner of war could not be described in any manner but as a time in hell. They had been starved and abused to the point that they were willing to risk their lives to escape.

Colonel Hogan and his men headed to the ball bearing plant. Hogan could speak German well, but he did have a slight accent. That was why Carter did most of the talking. He spoke German fluently. As they approached the guard who was stationed at the guard house, they showed him the papers for the repair of the furnace.

The guard read the orders and agreed to let them in quite happily. The furnace had not been working well for months and he had thought that they would never be repaired. A non working furnace at a factory in Germany was on the low order of importance for Hitler and his men.

As the three men headed toward the building they were met by the night foreman. He led them to the furnaces and they each took out their tools and began to check things with their meters. When the men were finally left alone, Carter went to work placing the fuses for the bomb. He found an ideal spot and set them up.

The funny thing was that one of the men Newkirk had worked on furnaces before and to totally throw off the Germans at the plant he got the furnace working once again. Carter then set the timer on the bomb for thirty minutes. This would allow the men to get back to Stalag 13 and be outside of any suspicion. Of course there was always the danger that someone would find the bomb, but Carter had done her best to make sure that the bomb was well hidden.

As the men left they smiled and chatted for a moment with the guard. They made their way back to Stalag 13 and climbed back down into the stump. To their pleasure they found the men who had brought the prisoners to the submarine had already arrived back at the camp ahead of them. All had gone well.

As the men went back upstairs to the barracks they went to the door. They counted down to the time of the bomb and as they went down to 0 they heard the bomb go off. From their barracks they could see the lights of the fire and hear the noise of the explosions as the plant went up in a ball of flames. The fire and the dark red of the flames could easily be seen by them and they cheered knowing that they had done their job well.

Colonel Klink had been in the uncomfortable position of sitting with Gertrude when he had hear the explosion. The plant was just two miles from her house and as the two of them ran to the window they could see and actually feel the heat of the flames. The fire trucks went flying by the house and then the ambulances. The damage was major as Colonel Klink and Gertrude could see. There was a large loss of life also. 'Sabotage again, what was this war coming to?' he thought.

General Burkhalter had been at his desk writing when the explosion had happened. He got up and quickly looked out of his window. This was something that had to be stopped. There was some kind of espionage ring in the area and he was going to make sure that he broke it.

Back at Stalag 13 Colonel Hogan and his men celebrated the successful bombing of the ball bearing plant. They then knew that their jobs would continue and the dangers were always present. But for now, they had been successful in closing a plant in the area and in one short moment had stopped the German's or slowed them down at least once more.


End file.
